DOTA. Oh, FOJ.

For those of you who are acronymonally challenged, I'll be kind and explain the constant barrage of letters that seem to be invading my life with every passing second. In my tendency to pick up people's vocal mannerisms, I've been attacked by Nick's love of turning mundane phrases into acronyms of distinction. I'm LOVING it. So to begin, DOTA stands for Day of the Acronym, which is what the Fourth of July (FOJ) officially turned into.

Half way through the afternoon as I was lounging around with David and Nick, I realized that I had enough energy to journey out of the city to my sister's party in Larchmont. Carson has been teaching Pilates to a select list of clientele in this gorgeous town for about two years now but this was only my second time escaping to the paradise by the Long Island Sound.

(Before the day had even begun, I was practicing my magic (aka stripping) in the station.)

(We started out two boys running through the immensity of Grand Central as we frantically tried to locate the right track. Would the day change us? No.)

(Fortunately Libby and Tobin had saved us seats and we began bonding over our Montanan status. It's like that old Zen thing....how many Montanans can you fit in a tire. Anyone? Anyone?)

(In no time we were traipsing amongst the palaces of Larchmont and I had found my hair twin Carson!)

(We arrived at the castle (home) which is only about 10,000 sq. feet bigger than my humble abode.)

(The house was infested with PIAB's (Pig in a Blanket) which would quickly find their way to my mouth.)

(Some fresh air was needed after eating all that processed meat. Mmmmmmm. Thinking of it kind of makes me PIMM (puke in my mouth.))

(But who doesn't save room for enough dessert to satisfy Homer Simpson?)

(Nick was thinking he might dive off the end of the pier after eating so many sweets but I urged him to stop. There were cute children around.)

(Of course we had to congregate back inside because Carson was about to dance.)

(We formed an impromptu theater in the round and Carson was, as usual, FAS (Fucking Amazing Shit.))

(Stealing toys from children is FAS too.)

(Nick is the FAS king.)

(At some point the night had to end. Booty. Booty. FAS.)

(But not before we had a "Firework Hair" Battle.)

(To the DEATH!)

Ah, holidays. Now I don't need to eat for a week.

Comments

[Anonymous]

in re: DOMA
Defense Of Marriage Act

[Rob]

Acronyms are fun, we use them none stop at work(I work for a college in the admissions dept).